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The Nature of ItWhat I feel goes further than the point where the water meets the sky
Beyond any question of "Why?"
Far across the stars scattered way up high
What is within for you is more beautiful than the colours of the rainbow
Travels passed the sun on the horizon
Is more infinite than the seeds of strife that life can sow
It is grand and strong and joyous such as the thrill of flight
Ingrained and natural has breathing
Mysterious, lovely, calming, yet exciting as the night
It is as complex as calculating the rotation of the Earth
Heart and scent and sight
As simple as knowing, appreciating, and being blessed with all that is your worth
Brought on by imaginary adversaries
And (it seems)
Of emotions that go off on tangents
About what to do
And questions that repeat themselves
Until I collapse in a heap of tears
And crumpled Kleenex
'Cause I scroll down that line of text
And wonder what's next
And how to get these feelings off my chest
And wonder why
Wonderin' what's wrong
Until I realize that *I* am
That my parnoia has gotten the better of me
Getting crazy over friends
(Sometimes over strangers)
But sometimes those feelings are justified
But more often than not they aren't
And our hearts are just playing an insane part
But this is the place where are the craziness starts
For the Ones About the TimesThose moments come along when we think of what could have been
The ones that got away and the ones we pushed away
We justify and testify and still we can't convince ourselves of why
Why is it that we've done what we've done
And repeatative motions and repeatative words are useless
And we remain motionless
Not feeling quite blessed
Even if we are surrounded by happiness
We still feel stressed
We try to hide because we don't think we can survive
Through the lies we tell ourselves and the truths we tell too
'Cause we admit that our tears are futile
But we cry them anyway
Only to let them dry to the sounds of our sobs and our stories of yesterday
We know that part of us wished that they had stayed or that we had stayed
But the past is the past and in the past are things we can't change
Such as hearts and minds that have strayed from the path they once walked
Walked with our own and now we feel we walk all alone
But we aren't on our own and we relate to the tunes of o
No Time for TearsThere's no time for tears
There's too much to do
No time for sad thoughts
Thoughts about you
I'm using time I don't have
To write down these lines
I have no time for tears
I have no will to cry
This Is What Summer IsThis is what summer is
It's hot days
And cool nights
Underneath city lights
And cars crowding streets
The city humming along
With the soundtrack of our sweet summer lives.
rainsunAnd while the rain falls down on us
There's nothing else, there's nothing else
Well, nothing else but a silly notion
Of what was once a childhood emotion
And the little voice that whispers
"It could have been"
And the one that whispers back
"But now it can't"
So I'll lick my lips
As I turn my head away
Hoping you won't catch the desire in my eyes
But almost wishing that you will
And the thoughts that are playing in my head
Will get played out in real time
That you'll tilt your head down to mine
To taste the rain on my mouth
But that's not to be
And I know that too well
'Cause there's all this heat
That the storm we feel can't quell
So I'll move along
Pretending that there's nothing going on
Since that's just the way it's supposed to be
Quick.Stop.Speed.My nervous heart beats ever faster
While my breaths come in too short
Fearful thoughts race through my mind
Speeding by too fast to sort
You cannot fathom what you do to me
I myself find it hard to know
There's so much welling up inside
But my mouth it speaks too slow
I feel I've made a spectacle
I have no idea what words to say
Ideas conflict within myself
I choose wrong and put my stupidity on display
UnsaidThese are the unsaid words of the heart you'll never know
The thoughts and feelings of a love I'll never show
This is one of many attempts to express to you how I feel
The emotions of a broken girl who is just beginning to heal
Here it is laid out for you the things I'll never say
I write them out because I know I'll never let you read them anyway
FeelI feel useless and unpretty
Forgotten and alone
I feel not the least bit happy
I feel lost though I'm at home
I get jealous and unruly
My eyes begin to tear
I whisper words into the dark
That you aren't going to hear
I want to punch a hole right through the wall
I want to kick and scream
I want to hunt down certain girls
And be worse than their most frightful dreams
I am angry and possessive
I am guilty and ashamed
I am living through a lonely hour
And just wish that it would rain
I want the world to cry for me
I want someone to care
I want things back the way they were
But at times I don't mind that you aren't there
There's a million others out in the world
Lots of fish in the sea
But on cold and empty nights I find
I wish that you'll want me.
Can Your Parents Relate?You, the girl in the corner of your bedroom
That with each passing year since birth
Has had her confidence sold to those that stare
For so much less than it is worth
When it should be a priceless commodity
Especially to a doting dad
Is he not supposed to give to his child
All the things that he never had?
You, the girl in the corner of the classroom
That has forgotten how to smile
Are you tired of being told it’s just a phase
And you’ll snap out of it in a while?
It should be obvious that you are struggling
Especially to a loving mum
As she's already lived through those tearful days
That for you have yet to come
You, the girl hiding in the shadow you cast
Please accept your parent’s flaws
No matter what success or failure you taste
Do not let them be the cause
They created a life in love or in lust
Now nurturing has turned to neglect
A bird feeds her young till the day they can fly
So maybe now you should leave the nest
Beware Of The Bad BoySo he touches you in all of the right places
But with a clenched fist and not a gentle hand
By ‘right places’ I mean those easily hidden
By the latest expensive designer brand
Which he buys you to either keep your silence
Or to beg and to plead for your forgiveness
Is this where the attraction of a bad boy lies?
Please explain where is the excitement in this?
So he kisses you with a so-called passion
His hands round your neck steal a two letter word
It seems that he cannot feel satisfaction
Unless you show him signs that his dominance hurts
Which he tightens each time to keep your silence
Or maybe he just enjoys hearing you moan
Is this the deed of some stalker, some stranger?
No, this is your husband and this is your home
So he lays you out on the living room floor
I wonder what will fall down to the carpet first
The drops of blood from between your legs
Or the tears flowing between his regretful words
Which he whispers in your ear as you lay silent
It’s safe to say
Schrodinger's CatAm I alive? Or am I dead?
Have I just purred? Or have I bled?
Being locked in that dreadful box,
I have become a paradox.
A flask of poison on the floor,
A radioactive source in store,
And a hammer to judge my fate -
Try and define my doubtful state -
Am I alive? Or am I dead?
Have I just purred? Or have I bled?
BirdsThe birds are flaunting their wings by me
Knowing I can't fly.
What a joyful, blissful gift it is
To soar in the sky –
Racing softly through the winds
Up to touch the clouds.
That's the place to look for peace,
More is to be found.
The birds keep piercing through the morning streets
Free of people's vibes.
Reveling in the river's peaceful breeze
I'm only standing by.
Chirping merrily above
They must see best of life,
Making me, the wingless one,
Be glad that I'm alive.
The birds will always frisk across this scene,
Even when I die.
And ungodly hour colors bring
Enlightening sense of life.
No matter what may be,
Birds will be around.
Long as they are here to sing,
You'll be safe and sound.
Where are you? (poem)<3
Just us two,
Walking beyond the avenue,
Admiring the beautiful nature view,
Spending a moment only with you,
Is like.. a dream come true,
You're a friend worth holding onto,
O but there's one question;
Where are you?
Introspection in a Pale Moon LightAm I a dream of the universe?
A microcosm of the cosmos
A transient flash of memory
Soon forgotten for eternity
Am I a conscious collection of atoms?
Converging together at random
An essence in constant motion
Like a ripple upon the ocean
We are all made of star dust
Born when giant gas clouds combust
In a symphony of the spheres
Free from anxiety and of fears
We are never ending energy
Dancing across the galaxy
From Andromeda to the Milky Way
Like a ballerina in a ballet
Sleepy Summer EveningLate swallows swoop and pipistrelles skitter
To and fro across the house, skimming the eaves.
Against a soft darkening sky streaked with red
Gulls return to the bosom of mother sea.
The smell of grass rises sweet on the damp air.
While daisies quietly close their eyes in sleep
The blackbird sweetly sings a lullaby
And I to bed until his reveille.
DethronedDelicate fingertips were once against my cheek,
as were the smiles that you so affectionately cast towards me.
But then you tossed me into the gaping sea,
and I am no longer a beloved queen to thee.
MalfunctionFunctionin need of distraction
mind not at ease
breaths coming short
heart rate increasing
thoughts going nowhere
on keeping from shaking
when will it end
insides are quaking
hearing is sensitive
no one is calling
anger this brings
emotions are plenty
sadness and hate
worry and discomfort
the hour is late
nothing is happening
no one is there
if nothing is wrong here
why should i care
can't do a damned thing
mind is shut down
lip hurts from biting
mouth is a frown
when will the call come
to make this all end
closure and comfort
so i can function again
A Bloody, Stupid Miracle The day we’d cured the human condition was the day I put a bullet through my head and didn’t die. It was also the day I realized how scared I actually was of death, and after hours of muscle ache from holding that gauze against my open skull, after the wound closed and everything went back to normal, I had myself a good old-fashioned brainstorm. How ironic.
But when summer came, everything had fallen to shit. The air scorched my skin and parched my tongue every time I took a breath. The sun glared down on a rapidly-collapsing world, full of the undying bastard children of cruelty and misfortune. What was one to do when their cells regenerated faster than they decomposed?
My feet hit the pavement, now littered with jagged bits of glass to snap at my toes, thoroughly baked by the blazing ball of bitter disdain high overhead. Today was worse than yesterday. Though I’d often wondered the purpose of it anymore, I
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